This is for all divers out there (:

Your Eulogy

Last week, I was having an interview on Google Hangout (for those of you who have never used this, I strongly urge you to give it a try, the tiara and sound effects are phenomenal!) and after the first couple questions, the guy stopped and thought really hard. He explained that he was figuring how best to phrase the question. Finally, he said, “If you were dead, what will someone say at your eulogy?”

On hindsight, I thought this interview question was brilliant on two counts. Firstly, it strips away all the superficial stuff and get to the essence of what you will really like to be remembered for – be it your kindness, a smile that brightens the room every time, the compassion for all small animals or simply how you touched people’s life (yes I used some of the above but not all). Secondly, it allowed people who hate to blow their own horn, (like myself,) to talk about themselves objectively “from a third person’s viewpoint”. Well, no one’s gonna say mean things about you in your urology right?

Although it may be a rather idealistic way to look at one’s career, but it does shed some light on what’s important to you. B pointed out to me subsequently that the qualities I wanted to be remembered for, I could still achieve even when I am not working. It’s like envisioning how you want your legacy to be, and that could be being the world’s best dad, the greatest Liverpool fan (or not, after last night’s game) or simply, the girl who always had a moment for someone who needed it. It may or may not have to do with your career, like how Steve Jobs wanted to change the world, but it gives a glimpse of who you really are, your priorities and what you truly are passionate about. And that, as MasterCard will say, is priceless 🙂

What determines your creativity

So this is a fairly long video where Channel News Asia put together a bunch of “creative types” to talk about the creative environment/developments in Asia. I just wanted to comment on Paul Bennett’s response to this 17 year old Singaporean girl’s question regarding her teacher’s comment that the odds of her finding a job will be much higher if she were to get into the science track instead of the arts track. Paul said he was in the 21% who succeeded and hoped that the chances of success could be viewed as equally viable between the two tracks, somewhat implying that the arts track should be encouraged to develop the creative side of the nation.

I beg to differ. Creativity, in my humble opinion, is a mindset. Creativity, especially in our world today, is no longer confined to solely traditional art forms, like a song, a script or a sculpture. Innovation can be found in a well-designed consumer product, a breakthrough management strategy or an enhanced customer experience. Both the arts and the science tracks are mere means to an end. The application of thinking out-of-the-box is not restricted by the nature of your job, the formal training you’ve had nor the subjects you’ve studied. In fact, it’s the “soft” education you’ve undergone that is likely to have a greater impact on your ability to be creative. Don’t let your choice of science or arts track determine your creative confidence. Be creative in your demonstration of creativity. (Sorry, the pun was too tempting to resist :p )

Creative Business Card Designs

These are brilliant! Just to add a bit of fun, I’ve assigned awards to some of the most interesting ones! Click here to see the rest!

Best DIY: Sommeliere Wineglass Business Card

 

 

Most useful: Bike Multi-Tool Business Card

Best pickup line: Makeup Business Card

Most slick: Dentist’s Cavity Business Card

Most difficult to read: Stretchy Personal Trainer’s Business Card

Most fun: Hairdresser’s Business Card

Most edible (or not): Survival Training Dried Meat Business Card

Most explicit: Cosmetic Surgeon Business Card

Personal Favourite: Event Photographer Viewfinder’s Business Card

Is Punishment or Reward More Effective?

This youtube video (inspired by Daniel Kahnman’s book, Thinking Fast and Slow) argues that punishment and reward has no effect for the improvement or detriment of subsequent performance, which is simply a result of regression to the mean – extreme events being diluted by average events. Israeli pilots who performed badly did not improve from punishment; neither did the better performing pilots do worse because of praises. I see concerned parents panicking – do I then punish or reward my child to increase chances of improved performance??

The guy in the video raised several examples, one of which is that speed cameras do not help to reduce the occurrence of road accidents. This I disagree. In Singapore, the traffic police actually puts up a sign to warn drivers that a speed camera is coming right up ahead. How awesome and to-the-point is that?! The purpose of the speed camera is to avoid unnecessary accidents and not to increase the fine revenues for the government. The design of the road is unfortunately prone to accidents, which is exactly why drivers need to be reminded to slow down. The sign helps to achieve that objective (through fear of punishment ironically) more effectively that having only a speed camera alone.

Going back to the child-raising reference, interestingly enough, today I had a chat with a friend. Her niece was so engrossed in the idea of pleasing her mum that she “pretends” to be the ideal daughter. She will go through the motion of doing numerous practice papers just to show how hardworking she is but has no interest and does not actually learn anything from the exercise, seeing that she makes the same mistake in 4 consecutive practice papers. The young girl then earnestly tells her mum she will try her best no matter how tired she is, so her mum thinks her daughter is such a sensible and good girl. My frustrated friend laments how mothers should not believe entirely in those parenting books which advocate only praising your children for best results. In fact, sometimes the cane might do a better job. Moral of the story? There is no one perfect solution, read parental books with a discerning mind and dispense as needed for your child’s very own unique needs.

 

 

The art of asking, the power of crowd funding

We always admire the people most for things we are weakest ourselves, for example, the athletically-disinclined will envy the sports stars, the deaf-tone will admire those who can sing. I admire Amanda Palmer for her ability to ask. In her Ted talk, this charismatic musician-blogger-speaker talks about her days as a street performer (the 8-foot bride), her couch surfing where her fans (illegal immigrants) offer her their beds and sleep in the living room, and her overwhelming success at crowd-funding where she raised USD1.2mio from ~25,000 fans. Highly controversial, she believes that music should be free, and fans should directly support artists for their survival. In her own words, “the whole idea of asking the crowd for what you need when you need it and not asking for more or less.”

I cannot relate to her music (nor her eyebrows) but I do have tremendous respect for her, aside from her entrepreneurial spirit and passion for her craft, but most specifically for her ability to ask. Growing up as an Asian, I feel embarrassed to ask for a favour, for help or for anything really. Ok maybe I can’t blame it all on my roots, but I think Asians do significantly underestimate the intrinsic value of engagement.

Amanda describes her exchange with someone who puts some money in her hat when she was a street performer – she would look appreciatively at the person and (rightly interpreted or not), the person will give a look back that says “thank you for noticing me today.” That example is a bit out there for me to grapple with, but I can think of other examples that apply.

For instance, on rare occasions that I do reach out to some acquaintances for help, they go out of the way to do a good job for me. My only conclusion is that why you treat people nicely in a genuine manner, they enjoy your company (even if it’s for a short while) and don’t mind going the extra mile to pay it forward. Sometimes (like today), when I go to a cafe and sit all day and only order a cup of coffee, I feel bad because I may appear cheap but really, there’s other intrinsic values to me being there – its shows that someone appreciates their coffee (and not just the free wifi and power sockets) to visit two days in a row, and a healthily busy cafe looks more appealing to bypassers (not that bypassers can see how crowded this second-storey cafe is as they walk pass). But yeah, you get my point! We should all learn to ask more.

On a side note, fun fact: Lady Gaga employed a very similar grassroot approach in engaging fans too when she first started out. She went on a long touring schedule, 7-8 shows a week, sometimes 3 times a night, targeting to build a fan base with a strong core that will support her whole-heartedly thereafter. Lady Gaga relied heavily on Facebook, Twitter, and Youtube to spread word of mouth and strengthen her connection with her fans, whom she fondly refers to as her “little monsters” . In fact in 2011, Lady Gaga was the most popular living person on Facebook and the most followed person on Twitter. Of course, she had the backing of Universal Music Group which made a lot of difference in funding availability. However, her staying popularity in the transient entertainment industry (other than her outrageous fashion choices and showmanship), has a significant part to do with the tremendous efforts she employs to engage her fans.

 

My inner procrastinator

I am a self confessed life-long procrastinator. The issue was never about identifying the inner procrastinator but turning it into a tool to make you a more effective person. Which is precisely the reason that prompted me to sign up for Harvard’s online course – Unlocking the Immunity to Change: A New Approach to Personal Improvement. Unfortunately, I’m only at the goal-making stage so I can’t provide much feedback on the usefulness of the course – the course moves rather slowly and I am as mentioned above, a procrastinator. But I do hope, that I may be able to make some difference to this sickeningly undesirable quality soon(ish)!

 

 

The Broken Bicycle Chain: Tan Lai Yong

As you may know by now, TED talks are a pet favourite for me and I’ve watched many of them. However, this is the first one by a Singaporean that I’ve seen. It was a very well-crafted speech, intriguing (I find myself racking my brains to figure what entrepreneurial intentions the villagers had behind their actions), concise and effective. I have deep admiration for this man because I do not know of one single person around me who is able to care so little about materialistic possessions, especially when you grow up in Singapore. Yours truly often go through this internal struggle myself as I contemplate my career options. Through a simple story of a broken bicycle chain, Dr Tan shares profound insight from his time in Yunnan on sustainability.

More from Dr Tan in below interview: http://singaporemagazine.sif.org.sg/the-road-less-travelled/

 

How to say sorry properly

A simple solution to a tricky problem – application of design in human interaction? ;p

Instead of just saying the word “sorry”, think about what you are apologizing for, why it causes hurt to another party, how may you prevent this in the future and viola! the request for forgiveness sound way more sincere!

I’m sorry for…
This is wrong because…
In the future, I will…
Will you forgive me?

I have so often hear my niece say sorry without meaning it and we all know it doesn’t mean nuts to her cos it rolls off her tongue with barely a thought and she will repeat the same mistake again in less than 5 minutes.

Well, she is only three years old but perhaps with some guidance, she can learn to say a proper sorry and cause a little less pain all around. I dare not hope that it may make her truly repent but heya, every bit helps!

 

Weakness into strength

Thought below story from Yellow Ribbon Project was very interesting. Challenge of the day – think of how you can make either one of your weaknesses or one of your friend’s weaknesses become a strength! Don’t pick an ambiguous weakness, you have to pick one that’s more blatantly disadvantageous! I know it’s hard! I’m still struggling to find one, not the weakness (those I’ve plenty of) but how to turn one around!

Boy’s WeaknessA 10-year-old boy decided to study judo despite the fact that he had lost his left arm in a devastating car accident.

The boy began lessons with an old Japanese judo master. The boy was doing well, so he couldn’t understand why, after three months of training the master had taught him only one move. “Sensei,”the boy finally said, “Shouldn’t I be learning more moves?” “This is the only move you know, but this is the only move you’ll ever need to know,” the sensei replied.

Not quite understanding, but believing in his teacher, the boy kept training. Several months later, the sensei took the boy to his first tournament. Surprising himself, the boy easily won his first two matches. The third match proved to be more difficult, but after some time, his opponent became impatient and charged; the boy deftly used his one move to win the match. Still amazed by his success, the boy was now in the finals.

This time, his opponent was bigger, stronger, and more experienced. For a while, the boy appeared to be overmatched. Concerned that the boy might get hurt, the referee called a time-out. He was about to stop the match when the sensei intervened. “No,” the sensei insisted, “Let him continue.” Soon after the match resumed, his opponent made a critical mistake: he dropped his guard. Instantly, the boy used his move to pin him. The boy had won the match and the tournament.

He was the champion. On the way home, the boy and sensei reviewed every move in each and every match. Then the boy summoned the courage to ask what was really on his mind.
“Sensei, how did I win the tournament with only one move?”
“You won for two reasons,” the sensei answered. “First, you’ve almost mastered one of the most difficult throws in all of judo. And second, the only known defense for that move is for your opponent to grab your left arm.”

The boy’s biggest weakness had become his biggest strength.

Moral: Sometimes we feel that we have certain weaknesses and we blame our creator, the circumstances or ourselves for it but we never know that our weaknesses can become our strengths one day. Each of us is special and important, so never think you have any weakness, never think of pride or pain, just live your life to its fullest and extract the best out of it!